bohren_ooc | Stolen Hardcore from Mayfield

So lets get started. FIRST GROUP IS:

1. Jade
2. Milla
3. Dist
4. Raz
5. Bri

I am beyond excited. We are gointg ahead and starting our Journey in April, because I don't know, I have no strategy here guys, I'm just playing a long

We start with 6 Ox's, 800 lbs of food (Because Dist said he wasn't going to eat any grass), 8 sets of cloths (Milla said that it would be silly to waste money on such a thing, and Raz is small anyway), 30 boxes of bullets (because Bri said it would be ridiculous to get only a few boxes), 3 wheels, 3 axels and 3 tounges (Bri got pissed when she found out they couldn't fit more spare parts, 'WHAT THE HELL, WHAT IF SOMETHING HAPPENS?!'), and after realizing we had money left, Dist bought 5 extra sets of clothing and Raz and Milla bought 2 more oxen because they are adorable and Jade bought 10 more boxes of bullets.

LETS GO!

So we leave from Indepence on a stead pace, its cool outside, Jade is teaching Raz how to drive the Wagon JUST IN CASE, Milla is singing, Dist is mumbling about how stupid of an idea this is and Bri is figuring out how to work the guns. Off to the Kansas River, everyone is in good health and the food is quickly vanishing.

We get to the Kansas River crossing about a week late, and everyone is in good health, no real change at all. Everyone seems to be getting along, we still have plenty of food, and the weather is slowly warming up.

A pacing stranger lets us know that they can't afford the ferry and that they hope the river doesn't flood. Also that his Rattata is in the top percentage of Rattata....anyway, we attempt to cross the river which is currnetly 630 feet across and 5.1 feet deep in the middle. Dist starts to scream about there is no way he is crossing the river while Jade and Bri discuss on their percentege of making it.

Raz and Milla are chasing a passing butterfly.

We decide to cross the river....The oxen do fine and Dist realizes that the water is slowly starting to close into the wagon. He starts to scream to Jade and Bri who scream back "SHUT UP WE CAN MAKE IT."

3 of the Oxen get caught in a current, a wheel, an axel and 2 of the wagon tounges and all the extra cloths Dist bought get flushed down the River.

Also Milla drowns when she tries to catch another butterfly.

D8

oh god they are all going to die.

So everyone is a bit sad, Dist is glad to see that Milla is gone and steals her extra pair of cloths. Raz is full of sad, but PUSHES ON. They travel for another week until they get to the Big Blue River crossing. Dist tells everyone to fuck off and shovels out the money for the ferry. Jade and Bri inform him that there is no ferry here and they must attempt the river themselves, which is much smaller than the last one.

Raz mentions how he misses Milla. Everyone looks around and the ford the river. Dist sighs and starts to scream AGAIN as the water starts to float in. Luckily, no one dies, but they loose over 600 bullets, an axel and one of the Ox, which Dist had named fluffy, drowns.

:|

Our next stop is a Fort, but we reach a gravesite and Raz wants to stop. So they do, Dist stays in the wagon, and the other 3 check the gravesite. "Here lies andy. peperony and chease" (I'm not joking).

....They all simply turn around and leave, still trying to figure out wtf just happened.

We reach Fort Kearney. And Jade realizes that...we need Ox's...and bullets. A woman comes forward and asks for our last remaining Wagon tounge, in exchange for 52 bullets. Jade looks at the woman and simply walks away.

Dist mentions that he is staying here and going back because he hates this trip and it was the worst idea ever. Bri takes their money and buys another Ox, some more ammunition, 20 more lbs of food and a few spare parts for the Wagon. Dist asks for some new cloths, and she buys him one ugly jacket. He tries to return it, but Bri hands him the rains to the Ox and asks him to put it on the Wagon.

Dist again mentions that he is leaving, but no one listens and they leave the fort. Raz waves goodbye to everyone as the leave (baw)

Next one he list is Chimney Rock. Weather keeps changing, health is good. They realize a day later that they are heading in the wrong direction and lose 2 days (GOOD JOB GUYS, I WOULD BLAME DIST BUT THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL BRI OR JADE WOULD LET HIM DRIVE).

Chimney Rock in the distance, about 10 miles away and a freak Blizzard shows up OUT OF NO WHERE. Dist blames Jade for their suffering and thanks Bri for his ugly jacket.

They loose a day, and Raz notes that it is strange that a blizzard showed up when the weather conditions are warm. The Oregon Trail Gods appear and tell him to STFU.

So! At Chiminey Rock, Jade mentions they should carry on since they have lost so much time, but Jade jumps off the Wagon to explore. He tries to trade with an emigrant who wants 359 bullets exactly. Dist offers him the 276 they have, but he says he doesn't want 276, he wants 359. Dist throw the bullets at Jade and tells him that trading is hard.

Bri mentions the next stop is Fort Laramie as she stares at the Map. Dist almost throws Raz overboard when he sees something off the edge of the trail. He tells Jade to stop and they find SOME WILD FRUIT!

Bri tell shim not to eat it, but he does anyway. They reach Fort Laramie and Dist attempts to trade again. He meets another emigrant who wants 2 of their 3 wagon tongues and offers a single wagon axle in return. Dist tells the man he is stupid and that if he wanted to trade him something, he should have offered cloths or food. Luckily Jade drags Dist off before he can call the emigrant something he would regret.

Raz picks flowers for Bri and it is adorable. And it starts to rain. Jade buys some as much food as he can and Bri mentions that they could probably stay the evening at the Fort instead of daring the Rain. Dist tells Bri this is the best idea she's ever had, until she mentions that they will be staying in the wagon instead of staying at the Inn.

He calls her a bitch and ends up sleeping under the wagon that night.

They rest for a day and when they awake, they find that the rain has given to the hottest weather they have come across. Jade drags Dist back into the Wagon and they set off for Independence Rock.

During their first day on the road, Raz starts to look for some more wild fruit like Dist found and ends up getting bit by a snake :| Everyone is angry and tries to figure out what to do. They decide that it doesn't look too serious and carry on. The Weather lets down and they reach Independence Rock with no casualties (hooray!) unless you count the one Ox that just wandered off for no reason what so ever. Dist is blamed, though he swears he didn't do it (he totally did).

Jade mentions they should probably carry on, but Dist is going to trade something DAGNABBIT. Another Emigrant approaches him as he has all their items on display. He offers a them a Wagon Axel for an Ox. Dist tells him GOOD DAY and packs up there things and attempts to leave, almost leaving Bri in the process.

The next spot on the trip is South Pass. They reach it in almost no time, but the realize that they are running out of water and there is inadequate grass for the Oxen (Dist mentions this about 3 or 4 times).

Dist jumps off the wagon and screams out if anyone wants to trade. Everyone looks at him and simply leaves the pass, no one wanted to trade with him. Dist is sad, but Raz consuls him with a flower.

Bri and Jade yell for him to get back into the wagon because they weren't even planning on stopping.

They leave for Fort Bridger, and Bri mentions that they are starting to run out of food. Dist starts to panic but they forget to change their rations. They run out of water when and another Ox wanders off. Dist blames it on the lack of water and the heat.

They run out of food before they reach the Fort, about 60 miles away. Jade goes to eat some of the Wild Fruit he found and realizes they are all rotten. He runs into the store and buys 120 lbs of food, leaving them with only 3 dollars left. Jade takes the food and sets up a ration system, which Bri mentions they should have done a long time ago. He mentions that everyone will get a meal a day, and they they will probably all stay fairly hungry.

Dist is not please.

Soda springs is next, and the food is being rationed well. They still don't have a lot of water and the food is low. About a 100 miles outside soda springs, Bri contracts cholera. Dist tells her to stay away from him, but Raz does his best to take care of her.

THEY ARE SO SWEET :|

Dist manages to catch exhaustion, which is astonishing to Jade because he has barely lifted a finger for the past month.

Raz tries to play nurse to the two, but with the lack of water in the area they are traveling through, its gets rough. During a breif HALLUCIANATION, Bri wanders out of the Wagon and manages to get a snakebite. Things don't look good, everyone is feeling the heat of the summer.

Bri manages to wander off AGAIN, falling out of the wagon and BREAKING HER ARM. LET ME REMIND YOU SHE ALSO HAS CHOLERA AND A SNAKE BITE. HOW IS SHE STILL ALIVE. WTF.

Dist calls Jade a Nazi for rationing their food. Raz picks more flowers :|

THEN AN AXEL BREAKS. Bri attempts to help Jade fix it, and Dist simply looks on saying "Inadequate grass". Jade manages to fix the wagon axle \o/ and the carry on.

Jade also decides its time to hunt for some food. He kills a single rabbit and gets 4 lbs of meat. Dist tell him to turn around and go back BECAUSE THAT IS NOT ENOUGH SIR. Though a trader comes by and mentions how much he likes Dist's jacket that Bri bought him. He offers them 31 lbs of food for it and Dist literally throws the jacket at him

SUCCESS! HE HAS MANAGED TO TRADE! Jade returns with a squirrel, producing 2 lbs on meat. He mentions he saw a Bear and Dist takes the gun and manages to kill it, and a rabbit. He tries to bring back the 189 lbs of meat, but can only carry 100 lbs back. Jade is amazed and Bri, in a snakebite/cholera/broken arm delirium, takes the gun and runs into the woods and returns an hour later with nothing.

Raz takes the gun, thinking that they are all taking turns, returns with a deer and mentions how a bear walked RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM but he was so scared he didn't shoot it.

Dist takes the gun again and shoots a Deer, a bear and a squirrel. He can only drag back 100 lbs of the meat, but he grabs Jade and tells him to raise their rationing.

They rest for the day and eat like kings.

MEAT!

Dist kills another deer the next morning, mentioning that it was stupid that they spent all their money on, Bri reminds him that he was the one that spent all the money, and that she is also feeling much better.

About two more days into the journey, they come across some bad water and Bri gets Cholera. AGAIN. The rest of them dump out their water. They reach Soda Springs with less trouble. Dist attempts to trade agains since he did so well last time. A man asks for 167 bullets in return for a wagon wheel. Dist tells him to get out of town and eats some bear jerky.

They continue on the trail, their next stop Fort Hall. There is little grass and water, and they run across some bad water right before they reach Fort Hall. Dist attempts to trade again: but can find no one that wants to trade. They continue on the trail to Snakes River Crossing.

Dist does not want to go :|

One of the Oxen get injured on the trip and Raz attempts to make it feel better by feeding it flowers (baw). Almost right after they find an abandoned wagon. Bri tells everyone not to go in it, but Dist almost DIVE INTO IT and finds an extra set of clothing, the most fashionable tihng you could probably ever find in a wagon as well. He tells everyone that he found it, so it's his.

Bri rolls her eyes and then suddenly gets EXHAUSTION. SHE ROLLED HER EYES TOO HARD YOU GUYS. They get to a rough trail, which Dist rolls his eyes too. They reach Snake River Crossing and Jade tells Bri and Raz TO STAY IN THE WAGON. Dist and he go to investigate the area. A trader offers them a wagon wheel for an axel, but they brush it off.

They now have to cross the river WHICH IS 1000 FEET ACROSS AND 6 FEET DEEP. Jade and Dist give each other a look of "Oh shit." Dist looks at their 3 dollars and offers it to an Indian to help them. He laughs at the money and says he wants 3 sets of clothing instead. They have 9 at this point. Jade simply looks at Dist and he whines and whines, until they manage to convince him LIVING IS WORTH MORE THAN CLOTHES.

They attempt to cross the river. WHICH THEY DO WITH NO ISSUE! HOORAY! Dist tries to convince the indian he doesn't need all those cloths. But he simply leaves, leaving Dist THE SADDEST PANDA EVER.

The second they get onto the road, BRI DIES.

JUST FALLS OVER DEAD. THEY LITERALLY JUST GOT STARTED AND SHE DIES.

:|

Jade, Dist and Raz bury her and are sad pandas. They forge on and continue down a rather rough trail, the Wagon tongue BREAKS. Dist and Jade attempt to fix it, while Raz watches, but to no avail. They replace it with one of the spares. WHICH MAKES THEM MISS BRI MORE BECAUSE SHE WAS THE ONE THAT ALWAYS WANTED SPARE PARTS (sad forever).

They then manage to get lost in some heavy fog and loose a day of travel. ONE OF THE OXEN ALSO DIES. AND THEN THEY REACH AN IMPASSIBLE TRAIL, IN WHICH THEY LOSE 2 DAYS.

AND THEN
RAZ BREAKS AN ARM, I WILL ASSUME THIS WAS EITHER FLOWER OR BUTTERFLY RELATED.

BAH

OMG

AND THEN, THE LOSE THE TRAIL, AND LOSE 5 DAYS OF TRAVEL, ONLY 6 MILES OUTSIDE THE FORT.

BRI WHY DID YOU DIE, THEY ARE LOST WITHOUT YOU FOREVER.

They get to Fort Boise. And Jade quickly realizes they only have 28 lbs of food left. They attempt to trade for some, but the only willing emigrant wants 117 lbs of food, which they don't have at all. Dist tells the guy that he is dumb and the man gives him the finger. It's all very messy.

They leave and head for the Blue Mountians. Raz manages to find some Wild Fruits, even though Jade has told him not to leave the wagon IN FEAR OF CHOLREA AND SNAKEBITES. OH AND HIS ARM IS STILL BROKEN.

Jade goes hunting: for about a week and can only manage to get a squirrel and a rabbit. Dist tells him that he he doesn't kill him a bear then he will be pissed. The last day, he manages to find a bear and kills it. Moar bear jerky for Dist!

Back on the road, Raz is given the reigns and while Jade nods off, they manage to get lost down the wrong trail and lose 4 days of travel. Dist casually mentions that maybe a 10 year old shouldn't be in charge of the wagon.

The next night a thief comes and steals 73 lbs of food. Dist is not pleased, all of his bear jerky, GONE. The next night one of their oxen is stolen :| Dist is convinced that it is some sort of conspiracy and mentions to Jade that he wants to borrow the gun TO HUNT HIM DOWN. He is denied and they carry on.

They reach some water, but it is totally awful. But Raz, again, wanders off and finds some wild fruits. Dist is pleased. Its the toward the end of September and they lose another day in some heavy fog. Dist steals the gun and decides to go hunting, since Jade never manages to replace ALL the food they lost. He manages a single dear, and protests to staying another night and shoots nothing. Jade pressures everyone into pressing on.

Raz's arm looks almost healed and they carry on, reaching the Blue Mountains.

The beginning of October and they reach the Blue Mountains. And the trading is scarce and they realize they don't really need anything but more food at this point. They are fairly close to Oregon and have two choices: Fort Walla Walla, The Dalles. Raz says the Walla Walla sounds funny, so they decide to head toward The Dalles.

They reach about 20 lbs of food, when Dist goes hunting again: he plops himself in the center of trees and CANNOT SHOOT OUT OF THEM. A BEAR LITERALLY RUNS PAST HIM BUT HE CANNOT SHOOT IT. OH GOD TREES WHY DO YOU SUCK.

Jade takes the gun back and the next day and cannot get anything either. Raz then takes the gun while the two are napping and kills a squirrel.

Dist takes the gun AGAIN and returns with AGAIN NOTHING. Jade tries to go hunting the next day (with only 2 lbs of food left :|) and kills one bunny, getting 3 lbs of meat. The next day RAZ TAKES THE GUN AGAIN (OH GOD WHY CAN'T THEY GET ANY MEAT D8) AND AGAIN RETURNS WITH NOTHING.

Dist says enough is enough and tries a third time to kill something LARGE. He manages a squirrel, a giant bear literally runs up to him and then into the woods so fast, he had no clue what the hell had happened. A deer also sneaked up behind him and then ran off. Dist cursed the heavens in his meat conquest. He gives up and tells Jade to just shoot him.

Jade marches back into the woods, he says he wont be returning until he's killed something substainable. He is gone for 1 day,he retunrs with 100 lbs of bear meat, and tells everyone that he managed to kill 2 bears. Dist screams at the heavns for taungint them, and with the meat they carry on.

Raz gets bit by a snake, and then not even the next day, breaks his leg.

:|

I don't even know anymore. Not to mention they get to some bad water, and a rough trail. But they finally make it to The Dalles.

AND MY GAME RESTARTED ITSELF BECAUSE I HAVE A STUPID ADWARE THING THAT REFRESHED MY TAB AND KILLED MY GAME

:| FOREVER.

I WILL ASSUME THAT JADE CARRIES DIST AND RAZ TO OREGON AND THEY HAVE A FARM AND IT IS FANTASTIC.

ALSO BRI AND MILLA WERE ACTUALLY ALIVE THE WHOLE TIME AND THEY LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER

8|

So Mitch claimed that his party only needed one diva.

I DECIDED THE PARTY NEEDED ALL DIVAS.

1. Jade (basically, he's there to keep them from spending all their money on clothing)
2. Dist
3. Tarvek
4. Armonde
5. Milla

This is going to be great. And by great, I mean horrifying.

Jade is not about to waste time, and he knows these people are going to be full of delays, so he says to hell with it, they are leaving in MARCH. Cue whining from everyone, ever, that Jade completely ignores.

Jade outfits them with a balanced load of supplies:

1300 pounds of food
8 oxen
10 pairs of clothing
100 bullets
1 wagon axle
1 wagon wheel
1 wagon tongue

And off they go! Tarvek takes charge almost immediately and declares he is a map-reading EXPERT and will guide them to the Kansas River Crossing!

He gets them lost within sight of the river, and somehow takes two days to even find a way to get there again. Jade takes the map away from Tarvek.

They reach the river, which is running a bit deep. Jade declares that five days' wait on the ferry is too long, and fording won't work, so they'll stuff the wagons' holes full of caulk and float over. Dist mumbles something about holes and stuffing and caulk that Jade refuses to hear, though Tarvek makes an "ooooh~" noise.

They float across without incident. JADE IS A CAULK MASTER.

Jade opts to go hunting around this point; they actually have plenty of food, but he knows this is BISON COUNTRY. He takes the gun and...promptly shoots himself a fucking bison. 800 pounds of meat right there, and he doesn't even need that much so he only brings back 100. Dist alternates between swooning and snarling that it's not really all that impressive JADE.

Then Jade shoots another bison and a squirrel. Now even Tarvek is fangirling it up a little. Dist learns him better by yanking his ponytail and shrieking. Jade puts them on meager rations while he hunts so their meat intake greatly exceeds their consumption; everyone complains until he brings him another bison. Then no one really says anything. :|

Jade proceeds to bring home at least one bison's worth of meat every day for a week. Never question him again. He is a murder machine and these people will learn to respect that.

Deciding that 1600 pounds of food is probably enough to keep everyone's mouths full so he doesn't have to listen to them, Jade puts the party back on filling rations and they continue on their way. They reach the Big Blue River Crossing without incident. The water is running a bit high, so Jade has them camp by the river for a day while he decides their course. The next day, he declares they'll ford it; it's looking shallow. As it happens, he is correct and they make it across well enough...but then Dist falls off the wagon and gets stuck in the mud. Milla tells him to use his hips to wiggle free!

It takes twenty minutes to get Dist out of the mud, and the rest of the day for him to whine and bitch about his clothing. :|

A wagon axle breaks as soon as they start traveling again. Shockingly, Jade can't manage to fix it, but this is why they have spares! Or, well, the one spare. Another fort is coming up soon, and Jade makes a note to buy another.

They reach Fort Kearney just as March is ending, which as far as Jade is concerned is amazing time for this group. He buys 40 bullets and another axle. Dist and Tarvek both petition for new sets of clothing but are DENIED.

Upon leaving the fort, Jade decides to do a bit more hunting since he bought some extra bullets. He begins to single-handedly make the bison extinct. On one memorable day he shoots 2000 pounds of meat dead.

If anyone goes hungry on this trip, it ain't Jade's fault.

They make it all the way past Chimney Rock and to Fort Laramie - and Disc Two - without a single issue. Jade's experience with Dist has apparently made him a MASTER DIVA WRANGLER, because everyone is behaving wonderfully.

I think they're just terrified of Jade Curtiss, BISON SLAYER.

Jade buys another 20 bullets and some 200 pounds of food, just because their finances are in excellent shape and he knows that they've probably left bison country by now, which means not as much easy food to hunt. From now on? HE KILLS BEARS.

As the party continues, they find an abandoned wagon! Jade makes Armonde check it out, just so the man carries his weight. Armonde turns out to be an excellent scavenger, as he comes back with another wagon tongue, wagon axle, and set of clothing. Dist and Tarvek fight like wet cats over the clothes. Jade and Armonde idly place bets.

As they continue, they begin traveling through desert country where there's little water to be had. Their health drops to fair, and Jade allows for some rest while he does some trading. He trades one of their two spare axles for a bit of food, just because.

Once they continue, a thief comes in the night and steals five sets of clothing. Dist's screech can be heard from SPACE. Milla sways off the trail while Dist and Tarvek throw their respective fashion tantrums and finds some wild fruit! Jade considers this adequate repayment. DIST AND TARVEK DISAGREE STRIDENTLY.

The trail splits, and Jade decides to detour long enough to go to Fort Bridger. He needs to replace Dist and Tarvek's clothes or they're all going to have migraines for the rest of the trip. :/

On the way to the fort, Milla breaks her arm - one assumes she had her hand on her hip and hip'd too fast for the bone to withstand. :| Jade sighs and stops them for a break; he reduces the rations to meager again and goes hunting while Milla recovers.

Sadly, he is no longer as successful a hunter as he once was; there are indeed no more bison, and the terrain has become terrible, meaning he hardly ever has a clear shot at anything. Nonetheless, he comes back with several deer and a bear, because even Jade at his worst is pretty badass. :|b With more food, Jade puts the rations back to normal and they continue on to the fort. More food is bought, as well as four sets of clothing("But he stole five!" "Yes, but we picked up one on the road, so that was extra." "...BUT CLOTHES! ;A; " "Do I have to get the bison gun?").

On the road again, the wagon tongue breaks. Tarvek declares he'll handle this, because he is totally down with tongue action. And, amazingly, he fixes it! Dist huffs furiously when Jade seems approving of this.

...then another thief comes and steals EIGHT SETS OF CLOTHING. Which is to say, all but two people wake up naked. Dist's scream is the stuff of legends. Glass breaks. Wood warps. Small animals fall over dead. Jade and Milla keep the two remaining sets of clothing - "for modesty", as Jade puts it. Armonde declares Jade a dictator. Jade reminds Armonde what dictators do to dissenters....with a smile.

Jade, at some point, makes the mistake of giving Tarvek the map back - perhaps as a reward for fixing the wagon tongue. Tarvek gets them lost for five days this time, and the map is confiscated once more. Milla finds more wild fruit, however, so it's not a total loss.

They manage to reach Fort Hall without further incident, in the rain; go ahead and fix the mental image of Armonde, Tarvek, and Dist running into town alongside the wagon, dripping wet and stark naked in your mind. I'll wait while you're in therapy. Jade buys some more food and replaces the clothing again.

Milla forages some wild fruit as soon as they leave. Jade declares her officially the most useful member of the party besides himself...especially when the wagon tongue breaks again and Tarvek can't repeat his success repairing it.

A thief steals 43 pounds of food in the night. Dist declares that at least their clothes are safe.

The thief returns again, just to spite Dist, and steals six oxen...leaving only two. The pace slows to a painful crawl while Jade curses and sets Armonde on guard duty.

One of the remaining oxen gets injured. Before Jade can even rest it, it wanders off, costing them a day of travel. Then Tarvek insists on trying his luck with the map again and gets them lost for another day. Suddenly, all of Jade's best laid plans are falling apart. :/

Tarvek will not give up on this determination to earn his Orienteering merit badge. Another three day detour is lost to this madness. Jade may have given up by this point.

The party stumbles - or staggers - across an abandoned wagon with three sets of clothing. MORALE SOARS.

Given their slow pace with their two remaining oxen, Jade tries to find someone to trade them another, to no avail. So he sets food rations to meager, since it's going to take them awhile to reach the next fort at this rate.

Time to cross the Snake River! Jade gives their three spare sets of clothing to an Indian to help them across, over strenuous protests. Dist declares he will hate Jade forever! This may be the seven hundredth such declaration.

Only a couple days out from the river, one of their two oxen dies. Then they hit an impassable trail that stalls them for nine days. Then Armonde comes down with measles. Jade just...closes his eyes and makes his peace with death.

Jade tries going hunting while they wait for Armonde to recover, but between poor terrain and scant wildlife Jade only manages to catch about 60 pounds in two days. Milla finds some wild fruit, possibly in an attempt to cheer Jade up, but since Tarvek comes down with a fever immediately afterwards, this doesn't work.

Jade manages to trade nearly two hundred pounds of their dwindling food for another ox, on the basis that they can get to the next fort to buy more oxes and food faster this way. Dist comes down with a fever immediately afterwards. Jade...just...sighs. And goes hunting again. Milla finds some more wild fruit to help out.

They finally reach the fort, where Jade immediately replenishes their oxen and their food...but they've got very little money left, so they can't afford for anything else to go wrong.

Immediately out of the fort, Dist contracts the measles. Jade briefly considers taking up religion.

A lot of hunting is done, but thanks to being trapped in poor terrain, Jade has almost nothing to show for it. Then a fire strikes the wagon - Jade is fairly certain it's the gods trying to smite him personally - but all that's lost is two sets of clothing.

Dist and Tarvek sulk for days.

They make it to the Columbia River! Finances being what they are, Jade can't afford to take them along the toll road, so they float down the river.

...aaaaaand then the game reset. :| HOWEVER, they didn't crash, and presumably would have made it to Oregon at the end with no further loss of life or limb or clothing! Jade, however, probably went incurably insane.

No, no, give me back the map, I think I know where we are--

Because Sheik is an antisocial twat, he is... travelling only with his Pokemon. Go Sheik. Starting out from ~~Goldenrod~~ Boston, it's him and...

1. Sheik
2. Shadow the Umbreon
3. Leaf the Meganium
4. Dusk the Absol
5. Bacon the Piloswine

If all else fails, they can just eat Bacon.

One March day, they head off... with the following:

6 oxen
1400 pounds of food (have you seen how much a Piloswine can eat?
8 sets of clothing (mostly scarves)
10 boxes of bullets
3 wheels, 2 tongues, and 2 axles - be prepared!

And it's time to be off!

Wow, okay. This map is far more vast than Johto. Well, there'll be plenty of Pokemon Centres on the way, right? ...Right?

Seven days in, and... absolutely nothing has happened. GOOD SHOW. But there's a river and it's rainy - let's see if Sheik manages to cock this one up!

Hmm. It's deep. Let's wait a day.

...It's deeper. Okay, we're caulking this thing - the ferry is a whole five dollars, Arceus. Remarkably, no one dies. Hurrah!

I mean. Aside from BOREDOM.

Eleven days in, and poor Shadow is exhausted. Well, stop wandering off to stare at the moon, then :|

Another river! This one's only three and a half feet, so let's ford this shit.

...Oops. Um. Sorry, Shadow, we'll miss you ;_; The two wagon axles and 139 pounds of food, not so much. Sheik stops for like four days to mourn. Stupid Umbreon.

And now one of the oxen is injured? Stupid thing, do your job!

HEY, WILD FRUIT. You know who liked wild fruit? ...Shadow ;_;

Well, it's the first fort. We can replace the axles and the food, but we can't replace Shadow ;_;

The wagon has broken its tongue. Sheik tries to fix it and fails horribly.

Rest break at Chimney Rock. Sheik sulks for a while, the rest of the Pokes go, "Sod this for a lark" and bugger off to socialise. ...Entire parties starving? Planning for the worse? It'll be okay, Aunt Rebecca Sims, we can always just eat Bacon.

(Bacon: "Hey :(")

Off to the next fort. Absolutely nothing happens.

And off again. After a month and a half of travelling, Dusk gets typhoid. I didn't even know Absols got typhoid!

Landmark is visible! It's a blob.

Aunt Rebecca Sims mentions graves. Sheik runs off to cry.

Very little water, very little grass. Sucks to be an oxen.

Now then, fort or river? Sheik, in a moment of recklessness, decides on the river. Shadow loved rivers ;_;

It goes brilliantly, of course. An ox wanders off and they're lost for two days.

Finally, they're at the river. Everyone is in bad health (possibly from the bad water), so let's rest a bit. Like, say, a week.

Twenty feet deep. You know what, let's NOT try to ford it. Ferry it is! (Maybe a ferry would have saved Shadow ;_; )

Off to Soda Springs!

Bacon has a fever. You might say he's...

Frying up.

YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

And two days after that bad joke, Bacon is now... bacon. Well shit. And they were nearly at Soda Springs, too!

Let's... wait here a while, huh?

After a week, it's off to the next fort. Dammit, they're getting more food there. Meager meals suck!

...At least, it'd help if they didn't get the wrong trail and lose a whole five days. Sheik, your navigation has sucked since the loss of Shadow.

Someone wants two sets of clothing for an ox. Well, shit, not like anyone else needs them. It's just Sheik, the flowersaur, and the forebringer of doom.

Leaf has measles. WHAT THE HELL. HOW DOES A FLOWERSAUR GET MEASLES.

On the plus side, abandoned wagon with... a wagon tongue. GOODIE.

Wow, guys, we should have never left ~~Goldenrod~~ Boston :(

Aside from THE FLOWERSAUR GETTING MEASLES and a whole wagon tongue, absolutely nothing happens on this route.

Well, there's a river. Hired help for two sets of clothing? Hell, works for them. And across they go! Next stop - Fort Boise. Boise is such a weird name.

Now Dusk has measles. Flowersaur, forebringer of doom, stop it :|

...Leaf has measles AGAIN.

And one of the oxen has died. Way to go. Good thing we had a spare, huh?

Yeah, we're staying in Fort Boise for a week and a half because of the sickies. You know, we're already into October and still have mountains to traverse. It's getting cold! (Wish someone would tell Tucson that. Last day of September and it's 104 degrees.)

We break a wagon axle. Miraculously, Sheik can fix it.

Blue Mountains! You know, there's Blue Mountains two hours west of Sydney.

And time to split! Well, health is actually good, so let's get going straight for the Dalles. Be KIND OF nice if they get to Oregon before the snow!

WE'RE NEARLY HERE, GUYS. And the weather is warm, which is really freaking weird for Oregon in November. Seriously? We're lazy buggers, so the toll road it is... assuming no one else dies in the next hundred miles.

Dusk has measles. IT'S A RACE.

Five days lost to an impassable trail, but they're NEARLY THERE...

OREGON GET.

Well, that was fun. And only two people died!

Alright, let's do this!

1. Saori
2. Sasha
3. Sora
4. Viktor
5. Akito

8 Oxen
1100 pounds of food
10 boxes of ammunition
3 of each: tongues, wheels, axels
10 sets of clothing

Now we're off on the ~~Bohren~~ Oregon Trail!

As soon as they leave, a thief comes in middle of the night and takes SIX sets of clothes.For the record, Saori refuses to give up on her clothes since she’s the only girl among them, so she’s gonna let them figure it out.

They get to the river and decide to caulk the wagon. Success. Let's see how well their luck goes when it comes to hunting.

They draw straws and Sasha is picked. He goes out but doesn't get anything.

They arrive at Big Blue and Saori attempts to do some trading for clothes. One offers up an ox for two sets of clothing, a trade she cannot do, so she refuses.

The water was pretty shallow, so they decide to ford it. They almost got stuck in the mud, but they make it out alright.

Saori decides they need to hunt again and volunteers to go. She managed to get a deer, which was about 74 pounds of food right there.

As they get to the first fort, Akito spots a gravestone so he and Sora take a look. "Here lies andy. peperony and chease" ...A Big Lipped Alligator Moment much?

Sasha immediately buys 6 sets of clothing to replace the ones they lost earlier. He refused to wait until a good trade showed up. Also he purchases 110 pounds of food.

Saori decides that the party should rest for three days and then they'll set off again. She asks Sora, Akito and Viktor to go out hunting, but all three fail to get anything. (Where was Jade, the buffalo shooter when you needed him? Also, I totally suck at hunting. OTL)

Days later, Sasha goes out to hunt and manages to shoot a buffalo. Though it easily provided 900 pounds of food, he could only carry a 100 back. Needless to say, Saori was very happy and proud of him.

At Chimney Rock, Akito was able to trade a wagon tongue for 45 pounds of food. Though they kept their rations to meager, it never hurt to have extra food, as Saori taught him.

They didn't run into any problems on their way to Fort Laramie. Saori was glad they were making progress. They were almost half way there. Only a wagon tongue was purchased since they had less than $100.

While luck and the weather was on their side, they go. Saori asks Sasha to go hunting again and he once again gets a buffalo. Yay for buffalo jerky. Bad news was Sasha was exhausted now, but he insisted he was fine.

...That was until he died a few days later. Taking this as a sign, Saori decides to up the rations and rest for three days to recover everyone's strengths.

With heavy hearts, they buried Sasha and they went on. Viktor spots an abandoned wagon and finds two sets of clothing. More bad news was to come as Akito broke his leg. Probably from exploring the area.

Sora tries his luck to navigate, but they end up getting lost for three days...when they were only two miles away from the next landmark. At Independence Rock, they trade an axel for 41 pounds of food.

Just when they set off, an ox is injured and Akito managed to get a snake bite. Viktor, seeing Saori was rather troubled by all this, volunteers to go do some hunting. He comes back with more buffalo meat. Which only reminds Saori of Sasha and well...yeah.

They rest for three days and go despite the rainy weather.

Now Viktor had a broken arm. So for anyone that's counting, Saori and Sora are the only two uninjured.

Sora insists he'll do better navigating, but they get lost again for four days. Feeling back, they stop for a break, he walks around and manages to find some wild fruit.

On July 4th, they arrive at the South Pass. No one is interested in trading, so they rest for a day before moving on. Saori decides on the Green River pass. One guy wanted to trade an axle for 2 wheels, but Viktor declines.

Saori has been a bit of a penny pincher, but she was starting to think that the ferry was the best way to go. 20 feet deep was a little too risky for her.

Three days later, they use the ferry but at a cost. Sora drowned, 628 pounds of food lost, 6 oxen, 6 sets of clothing, 38 bullets, 3 wagon tongues, 2 axels and a wheel. Needless to say, Saori was not feeling good at all.

Viktor broke his arm again and Saori takes a shot at hunting. She gets a deer, but it's not enough and gets another one.

And now Viktor has dysentry. Now we've hit the FML section for sure.

Not taking chances, Saori decides to rest for three days. There's not much water, but she just won't risk it.

Sora decides to take matter into his own hands and goes hunting. It took him many times, but he actually got a bear. And later, he also gets a deer.

Deja vu all over again when Akito is hit with exhaustion. Saori halts the wagon and they rest for two days. They lost an ox due to lack of grass and water. Old Bessy. They were gonna miss her.

Viktor, apparently after recovering, finds another abandoned wagon. They manage to get a wheel and three tongues. At soda springs, they trade a wheel for an axle. Seeing they were in poor health, a three day rest was required.

Having only 5 pounds of food was not good. Time for more hunting. Akito decides to go this time. He managed to get 67 pounds from a deer from his second try. Saori's turn. A rabbit, bear and two deer later, they have another 100 pounds of food. Still not enough. Viktor only manages to get a rabbit.

Saori cuts their rations in the meantime, just until they get to the fort.

And guess who has dysentery again? Saori makes them rest for two days and ups their rations. Days later after recovering, Viktor got typhoid.

After a blizzard encounter that made them lose day, it's time to up the pace. At the fort, one ox and 100 pounds of food later, they're off.

An ox is injured, so Saori takes the time hunt and bring back a deer.

Viktor is a magnet for trouble, as he got lost. Cost them two days, but at least he was alive.

A severe blizzard makes them lose a day and Viktor gets a fever. Time is not at their side at all. Sora hunts down a deer for them. The trail is impassable and four days are lost. BTW, it's November.

Viktor now has measles and Akito has a broken arm. Correction, Sora died a while back, so edit as you please.

9 days lost due to another impassable trail. (FFF I'm so rusty at this.) 3 days more because they got lost. Frustrated, Saori goes to hunt and gets a bear. Trail lost again and lost 5 days.

It's now December. IDK how they're getting to Oregon now.

Trading is unsuccessful at Snake River. They decide to caulk the wagon and they succeed.

Early Christmas gift! Saori hunted down 2 deer and a rabbit.

And Happy New Year! WE'RE STILL ON THE TRAIL. Akito has dysentery. Great. And now he's died.

At Fort Boise, they can't even purchase food. But luckily a fellow traveler trades them 41 pounds of food for a wagon tongue. They get lost for two days. After Viktor gets exhausted, they rest for three days and wondered if this was some cruel joke.

And then Viktor died. Saori doesn't give up though. And even after a blizzard, she continues. 5 days were lost due to poor map reading. Apparently the insanity was starting to eat at her.

She ups the ration and pace, but it's too much for one of the oxen. An impassable trail makes her lose 8 days. She recovers a wagon tongue in an abandoned wagon. Though an ox wouldv'e been nice. 9 days lost now.

And now a theif stole the last ox.

March 18, 1849: That was the last day anyone has ever seen Saori. Stories now say there's a ghost haunting that area, asking anyone if they were willing to trade an ox.

Wow, that was utterly depressing. I swear, I'll play better than this. OTL

Stolen Hardcore from Mayfield

Adventure 1

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